Is it ok to cry with a patient?
Well I'm glad to say it is. I have been blessed to be placed with some incredible patients. Long-term care allowed me to develop rapport with a resident over a period of four weeks. In our time on the orthopedic floor at Evergreen I've been able to get involved in some great working relationships. The pre-interactive and termination phases of the relationship are quick since the morning report and discharge bookend the two days we work with each patient. (I like this a lot so that care can be really focused on, as well as relationship)
This week I met an incredible woman who demonstrated a great resiliency and bravery in attacking three surgeries in the space of eleven months. She's got the support of an incredible husband and friends, but she's still been pressed by the constant work of physical therapy, hospital stays and a relationship with her son that she wishes was better. While doing the Gordon's interview she apologized for the emotions she couldn't hide as tears rolled down her cheeks and sobbed broke her sentences. She wasn't scared or in pain; she was in need of empathy and compassion. Something in her story touched me and I briefly cried with her and asked her if I could give her a hug. She was so receptive and welcoming.
I've been thinking about that since. God's going to use us in any numbers of ways and it's going to demand different acts of obedience. Whether it's by discontinuing a foley with gentleness and compassion, or hugging a patient who is welling with emotions and has had defenses dropped because of opioid analgesics, God's going to use us to give people hope for something more. Without letting the moment and emotion take over it might make us shed tears or offer up prayers on behalf of our patients. I don't plan on making it a habit to cry with every patient, every time that someone's having a rough day, but I know that there will be times that it's the appropriate response. If for no other reason then because Father looks down at some of the messes we're in and cries with us. If we're really going to comfort people and bring them hope it's only going to come by mirroring what God's doing and who He is.
What is a nurse?
17 years ago
I was told that tears heal the heart, but it seems that the last three weeks that I’ve been at Overlake only brought on tears. I’ve had a patient that passed away, a patient that relapsed, a patient that went hospice…etc. I agree with you Bryan, God does use us in a number of different ways, which means we do have to be obedient to the way he wants us to provide that care. At times it’s going to be tougher than just administering meds or getting a patient on their feet once again after their fall. At times we’ll have to be the ones to tell parents in what bad condition their son is in; or give instructions to a family how to take care of their father while they wait for him to pass away. I only know one thing for certain, that the hurt and pain that took place during my time at Overlake tested my faith to a degree that I didn’t realize existed. Thanks Bryan for sharing your story, it’s comforting to realize that even though there will be rough days that God will use us to give hope to others. Even though our prayers for our patient don’t always seem to have an impact in the physical aspect, I believe that the spiritual aspect is being transformed as our prayers are uplifted to our Heavenly Father.
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